risks and opportunities: at the plate and ready to swing.

It’s a well accepted fact that fate has a knack for throwing curveballs at you when you least expect it. You could be chugging along more or less peacefully along a comfortable and well- beaten path when all of a sudden, an alternative path appears in front of you. Pros and cons are weighed, arguments are made and contradicted, advice is sought, given, thought through, considered or ignored, in the end a decision must be made: swing at the curveball or let it go and take a possible strike.

On Friday afternoon, I was pitched a particularly heavy-loaded curveball. I was having a nasty week at work, battling combined deadlines, an overbearing boss, an unsatisfying and (in my opinion) unjust year-end evaluation, to survive and make it to a Friday night that looked increasingly like an oasis in the middle of the desert. That’s when I got a phone call from my old boss at Nestle. There was casual chit-chat at first, and since the call was surprising in and of itself, I expected him to ask me some professional question regarding an issue I may have worked on during my stay in Switzerland. I certainly wasn’t ready for his pitch as he asked me, in typical laid back Swiss fashion, if I’d be interested to take a position at Nestle’s South American Regional treasury Center in Panama. Had he called to ask me whether or not I wanted an official Nestle Christmas card, I don’t think he would have gone about it any differently. At this point, I’m sitting in my semi-open space office and I’m too surprised and stunned to formulate a decisive response. We agree I can think the idea through over the weekend and get back to him on Monday morning if it appeals to me, before we start tackling the more concrete issues of job description, compensations, living conditions and other practical matters.

And so for the past 2 days, I’ve been wrestling with the idea almost incessantly, swaying back and forth more or less decisively, with varying degrees of determination, doubt and apprehension. For you see, it’s one thing to casually contemplate the idea of moving half way across the world to an exotic location for a few weeks or months, it’s another to consider medium-term relocation on a different continent only 9 months after moving to a familiar setting in an attempt to settle down and take root. I may be over thinking things but the prospect of pulling a 180 and going back on the road for anywhere from 3 to 15 years is quite daunting. It’s a decision heavy with consequences, a choice in lifestyle for years to come: stability and life-building versus adventure, constant change, and stories to tell.

Mind you, it is a privilege and what looks like a golden opportunity so by no means is it tragic or sad and I am certainly welcome and grateful for it. Such opportunities don’t come knocking too often in life. Turn it down and who knows when the next one will show up? And when you consider that Nestle is going out of its way to try and lure me back, knowing that I’m not satisfied with my current professional situation, it makes the whole deal very flattering and attractive. They could very well settle for a local from Panama to fill the position: it would be cheaper for them than to splash out on what will certainly be an expensive expatriate package. In fact, it is my understanding that their budget does not include hiring an expatriate for this position, but in order to make sure they do not lose a “quality element” (to use their words), they’re willing to bend the rules and push through with the offer. All the more flattering and honorable.

It doesn’t make the decision any easier however. I’ve been tossing the idea around my head pretty much non stop for the past 48 hours. I’ve talked to various people, friends with precise career paths and a history of traveling, other close friends whose advice I trust and value, and family of course. Talking with my parents has probably been the most fruitful and helpful so far: they’ve allowed me to wave aside the superficial issues and to look at the big picture as objectively as possible, which essentially means focusing on the professional aspect first and foremost. It doesn’t mean they do not care for the personal aspect of the decision, but they know very well that that decision is mine and mine only to take. No one but me can weigh the pros and cons on a personal level, and trying to weigh in on that decision would be unfair and selfish of them. Their support will be unwavering no matter what decision I take, and for that I’m incredibly grateful and admiring. However, they do want to make sure I take the best possible professional decision and in this matter they can assist and help me think things out. Because after all, there’s no point in torturing myself if the professional opportunity that is given to me isn’t an interesting and promising one both in the short term and in the longer term.

No doubt I will learn much at first, but once the novelty factor wears off, will the job keep me interested and challenged for the full 3 years I will be there? What will it lead to in the longer term? Would I unofficially be committing myself to subsequent 3-year tenures in other exotic countries, relocating successively as I climb the corporate ladder of an esteemed multinational company? Does it make sense professionally or is it a dead end? While I doubt they would have extended such an opportunity to me if the latter case was true, it’s something I still need to confirm with them. Only then should I really be considering the personal aspects of exiling myself, starting anew in a foreign country, and possibly starting a long streak of similar relocations.

But that’s easier said than done: after all, I’m potentially facing the prospect of having to gather my shit and move to the Tropics in only 6 weeks time! 9 months ago I managed to weasel my way back to Paris in an attempt to settle down, root myself to a place with friends and family around, to start building something concrete in my life. In essence, I’m about to roll the die on the type of lifestyle I will have for the next 10-15 years: rooted or on the move. You could look at it from various angles: adventure vs. comfort, change vs. familiarity. Which one appeals to me more, and at which point in my life?

Additionally, what happens if I turn down this opportunity? Life would resume for me as before: I would be surrounded by friends and family, having a developed social life, enjoying all that Paris has to offer, meeting pretty women, going out, eating out, enjoying 8 weeks of vacation a year, flying to Jazzfest, High Sierra, skiing, scuba diving, etc… But I would also undoubtedly find myself job hunting in a couple months. I’m disillusioned with my current job and the work environment is piss poor. I’m unmotivated and the outlook is bleak at best. I’d need to figure out what it is I want to do professionally before rejoining the interview merry go round, taking a chance on a new job, doing something different, possibly taking (yet another) pay cut if it’s something drastically different for which I have no prior experience. Will I be kicking myself in 6 months time for turning down such a chance?

Professionally, taking this posting in Panama is an easy ticket out of an uncomfortable situation. It’s far easier than unconvincingly diving once again in the job market. And it could be an additional step on the Nestlé fast track.

Personally though, staying in Paris in a familiar environment is obviously much easier and comfortable. Moving to Panama and starting from scratch amidst other expatriates is risky. I’ve done it once in Switzerland, where I could head back to Paris on a regular basis, and it wasn’t easy. Will it be any easier in South America? A lot of it depends on circumstances, so it’s a gamble.

There are other side notes to be considered but what it comes down to is this: Professional versus Personal. It’s a gamble. The bottom line is, do you swing for the fences or take the strike ? Christmas week isnt going to be as restful as expected.